Shat terd


The hidden half of domestic violence

How to have eternal life


An Article by George Rolph.

The title of this article says it all really. Men are conditioned by female expectations to always put women and children first. Why? Because all men everywhere are expected to be heroes.

The next time you pass a cenotaph in your local area take a look at the list of names displayed on it. Look at the honour roles in your local church erected to remember the war dead. Cruise the Internet and look at the survivor lists of those who survived the Titanic sinking.1

Does anything strike you about these lists, even without leaving the comfort of your home or office? Did you see that most survivors were female or children and most victims were men? Did that make you think? Well, I am hoping to do that with this article also. I want you to think about what we are doing to men today, and why. If you are a woman and you cannot face the truth about your sex, stop reading now. If you don't, you are going to get very uncomfortable.

The government and those within it are locked into a "Titanic" mentality that is having a disastrous effect on human relationships. Women and men within relationships are locked into the same mind set. "The marriage/relationship is sinking, put the women and kids into a life boat and let the man go down with the ship!" The problem is that men do not want to go with the ship. They have no need too. This drama is not being played out in the icy waters of the North Atlantic but in the icy thinking of Family Court officials, government offices and people with all the compassion of a psychopathic neo nazi, making ever more draconian laws that discriminate against men.

When a man finds his relationship is falling apart he often finds that both himself and his spouse have dug trenches and are sniping at each across no mans land. As they aim their verbal volleys the shots pass close by, or even hit, the children playing in no mans land. Both are equally guilty of indiscriminate shelling of the other. Both are reckless of the lives of their children but often, only one will take the blame. The man.

When he sees his children dragged into the trench of his "enemy" he will go over the top and charge across no mans land to get them back. Why? Because he is a man, he is supposed to be a hero. When he arrives at the enemy trench he will suddenly find that she has called in a huge army of reinforcements. Lawyers, Judges, Women's Aid, Court Welfare Officers, the press, her mother, friends and family. Retreating under a hail of fire he will stagger back to his trench, often shot to pieces and deeply wounded, only to find himself alone. No medals. No band playing. No one to call him brave and dutiful. Instead he lies alone in the mud, licking at his wounds and trying to muster the courage to leave the trench and try again. That is when he finds the propaganda of war is just as cruel as any verbal shell fire.

In the family courts he reads and hears descriptions of himself that bare no relation to reality. He is described as a virtual criminal. His "war crimes" are read to him over and over again. He finds himself described as "violent," "sexually manipulative" or "perverted." Dark hints are made that he may "interfere" with his children if he is allowed to see them in the future. Fantasies that she and he enjoyed in the secrecy of their bedroom are paraded by her as though they are facts. He had no idea that when she asked him to tie her up in bed that she would now say that he, "liked to tie me up but I hated it. I was too scared of him to say no." He is forced to listen to that time, one night, when he was feeling turned on and he said to her, "Lets make love darling." He remembers her saying, " Not tonight love. I am not in the mood." She had said that before many times. Yet when he had whispered in her ear or nuzzled her neck in that way she likes, her mood had changed. Now he hears her calling it rape. He remembers the times when he was not in the mood for sex either but he consented because he loved her. He remembers the time that she wanted to spend 400 on a dress and he felt they could not afford it so he refused to give her the money. Suddenly he finds that by doing so he was "abusing" her. He is staggered that "they" -- these men in suits -- are believing this stuff. He looks across the court room and sees the women from "Women's Aid" shooting vicious and hateful stares at him and she clutches his ex's hand protectively like some foul octopus and whispers tactics into her ear.

Sometimes he is accused of being violent to his ex partner when he knows he has never raised a hand against her. Sometimes the reason given for him never being able to hold, care for, love, cherish and enjoy his children, is simply that she "fears" he "may" become violent "in the future." He sits confused and shocked wondering why she is doing this. His whole life and personality have been redefined. According to this women, who once swore undying love to him, he is now a perverted rapist who beats his wife and may sexually abuse his children. As he reels beneath the hail of bullets being fired by his ex's army he feels that surely, at any moment, someone sane will ride to his defense. Someone somewhere will see that these weapons being used against him are banned under human rights treaties. Someone will challenge these Lawyers, Family Court Judges and Welfare Officers. Someone will demand some element of proof be brought upon these horrific accusations. You surely cannot simply say something is true and have a Judge or politician believe you because you just said it... Can you? That is not justice surely?

No. It is not! But it IS reality in the family court system.

Imagine his shock when no one comes to his rescue. Instead he is lead away to a life of pain and crushing defeat. The last glimpse he has of his kids comes as they are driven away from the court in a car. A car armoured by politicians with all the understanding of a brain dead troll.

Sometimes the man going through this travesty of officially sanctioned libel and slander breaks under the strain. He roars and curses in his frustration as he sees this travesty unfolding before him. He quickly realises his mistake. He stands there, in the court. Breathing heavily with his fists clenched at his side. His rage has subsided but he knows his rage has only helped condemn him. The Judge, the Lawyers, his ex and her "friend" from Women's Aid, the Court Welfare Officer, all stare at him. All are thinking the same; "Here is proof, if any where needed, that he is NOT a suitable person to look after his children." As he stands there he knows that even this is unjust. `Let them take the kids away from her and see how long she remains calm!` He thinks; But he now knows that in this kangaroo court of hearsay and opinion nothing he can do will be good enough. She would have to jack up on heroin in front of the Judge to even begin to look like she may be unstable. Never mind that her mind is capable of the inventions and sick accusations she has leveled at an innocent man. He knows that even if she did jack up on heroin in front of them all it would be seen as the desperate act of a woman suffering under the all pervading influence of a male dominated patriarchy that made her do it. God forbid we should expect females to take any responsibility for their own actions, let alone have prove the accusations she levels at her ex. It is easier to blame the men. After all, as women are fond of saying, all men are bastards, aren't they. All men are bastards? Yes, but that's not sexism, that's the voice of the oppressed.

As this father watches his ex destroy his life, reputation, financial security and mental/emotional health he should be forgiven for wondering who really is oppressed in this so-called patriarchy.

He leaves the court pathetically grateful that the Judge, in his/her "mercy," has allowed him to see his children for one hour on the first weekend of each month. For 12 hours a year, or put another way, for half a day, he will still be able to hold his children's hands. He will never be able to watch them unwrap Christmas presents again. He will never smile again as he hears them talking to the characters on the TV in their favourite cartoon. He will never carry them on his broad shoulders down to the surf at the sea side. In time, he will hear them call some other man (maybe a succession of men) daddy. His heart will reel in pain when he hears that. Maybe the new boyfriend will be aggressive and humiliate him when he comes to pick up his kids. It doesn't matter. He will swallow his anger and his tears. He can do nothing else. After all, he is a hero.


She has moved now and lives 300 miles away with her latest boyfriend. Our hero is on sickness benefit because of depression but, by not eating for a few days each week, he is able to save enough to make the train fare each month.

The day will come when he goes to get his children from her house and she tells him to piss off. He will go back to court and complain that she has broken the court order to allow him contact. Nothing will happen and he will learn that Family Court Judges only enforce orders against the father. He will complain. Write to his MP. He will write the home office. Ask his Lawyer to fight for him. Nothing will change. The deafness of the official abusers from government departments will not hear the cries of wronged fathers, or a man suffering from domestic violence. Writing to the papers will not help him either. They are as deaf as Jack Straw, Harriet Harman and other abusers of men masquerading as respectable men and women in Parliament and the Official Solicitor's office. All of these "official" bodies will trot out the same, well rehearsed lies to his every contact. One of the lies will be that, "the courts decide who has contact with children based on what is best for the child." He will know that is a lie. That it is a smokescreen for a hidden feminist ideology these bastards are so ashamed of they cannot, dare not, publicly declare it.

Frantically our hero will search the Internet looking for help. He is trying hard not to give up and he is now driven by a desperation born of passing time. With every day that passes his tenuous links to his children's hearts grows weaker. He feels their love slowly dying because of under use with each visit he makes to them. They are becoming little strangers. It kills him inside. As he taps the keys he finds site after site from all over the western world filled with stories that are similar to his. With great relief he finds that he is not paranoid. There really IS a radical feminist conspiracy to destroy fathers and the family. A creeping backdoor Marxism that represents the real enemy within that Margaret Thatcher failed to spot. In horror he reads quotes from these tarantulas.2.

"I feel that 'man-hating' is an honourable and viable political act, that the oppressed have a right to class-hatred against the class that is oppressing them."
(Robin Morgan, Ms. Magazine Editor)

"I want to see a man beaten to a bloody pulp with a high-heel shoved in his mouth, like an apple in the mouth of a pig"....."Under patriarchy, every woman's son is her potential betrayer and also the inevitable rapist or exploiter of another woman." ...."for a woman, the home is the most dangerous place in the world!" .... "The traditional flowers of courtship are the traditional flowers of the grave, delivered to the victim before the kill. The cadaver is dressed up and made up and laid down and ritually violated and consecrated to an eternity of being used." .... "Heterosexual intercourse is the pure, formalized expression of contempt for women's bodies."
(Andrea Dworkin).

"All men are rapists and that's all they are."
(Marilyn French, Author; and advisor to Al Gore's Presidential Campaign)

"We can't destroy the inequities between men and women until we destroy marriage."
-from Sisterhood Is Powerful, Robin Morgan (ed), 1970, p.537.

"The most merciful thing a large family can do to one of its infant members is to kill it." (Margaret Sanger, founder of Planned Parenthood, in "Women and the New Rage," p.67.)

"Since marriage constitutes slavery for women, it is clear that the women's movement must concentrate on attacking this institution. Freedom for women cannot be won without the abolition of marriage."
(Radical feminist leader Sheila Cronan)

He reads a piece about Erin Pizzey who started the worlds first shelter for battered women. In the piece he sees the following written: "She [Erin Pizzey] cites a policy document drawn up by Harriet Harman, Anna Coote and Patricia Hewitt in 1990, which says that fathers are "not necessarily" harmonious to family life, as an "invidious influence"."3.

As he reads he remembers the "sister" from Women's Aid staring at him in the court room with undisguised hatred. Suddenly he understands why the woman who used to love him became so vicious. She has been reading this stuff in female magazines for thirty years. Slowly being programmed by countless articles, television programs, soap operas and dramas into hating everything male.

He reaches down and picks up a magazine he brought home from the doctors surgery because an advertisement in it disturbed him.4. Yes, here is the evidence that he is not crazy. This conspiracy is very real. The picture in the advertisement clearly links death by violence and the institution of marriage, as if the first must come from the other. Yet it does not mention the men who are murdered by their wives.

Marriage Kills?

He looks up at the screen before him and reads what is written on the men's site in America he has found:

Child Abuse (A weapon used by wives in contested custody cases)

legal representation and support available free to all women, not men.
false allegations presume guilt
recantation is not allowed in most jurisdictions
loss of reputation
can be alleged and prosecuted via anonymous source
assignment to the state/national child abuse register on the basis of suspicion
risk of criminal/felony charges
loss of parental rights (usually at least one year during investigation)
does not provide punitive awards for false allegations
Sexual Harassment
legal representation and support available free to all women, not men.
presumption of guilt
recantation is regarded as suspect in most jurisdictions
judged by the "unreasonable" woman standard
loss of reputation
loss of job, profession
exorbitant financial awards
does not provide punitive awards for false allegations
Domestic Violence (VAWA - clearly unconstitutional legislation):
"A surprising fact has turned up in the grimly familiar world of domestic violence: Women report using violence in their relationships more often than men. This is not a crack by some antifeminist cad; the information will soon be published by the Justice Department ..."
legal representation and support available free to all women, not men.
recantation is not allowed in most jurisdictions
the physically "bigger" individual will be taken to jail
can be alleged and prosecuted via anonymous source
restraining orders are virtually automatic
loss of parental rights for the accused (read Dad)
loss of 2nd amendment rights (gun ownership)
risk of criminal charges and imprisonment
elevation from misdemeanour to felony consequences
does not provide punitive awards for false allegations 5.
On and on the list goes. He feels a great surge of indignant anger rising within him and immediately feels guilty. Surely, this anger is evidence of his hatred for women. The telephone rings. He picks it up. It's his friend Susan. They chat. He finishes the call and finds himself smiling. Susan is a good friend. She has always cared about him. He realises with relief that no, he does not hate all women. His anger is not the result of hatred for women. It's radical feminism he hates, in the same way that he has always hated all Marxist ideologies.
His Internet search continues late into the night. He finds a United Kingdom men's rights charity and fires off an e-mail asking if he can join the fight to get rights for men and real rights for children. Then he goes out into the cold dawn air for a walk.

As he prowls the streets trying to get his anger under control and trying to order his thoughts he finds a man slumped against a wall drunk, and sleeping. The mans hand clutches a huge almost empty bottle of cider. Our hero stops to look at the pathetic figure laying there on the cold concrete. He recognises him. The drunk used to be his friend. His name is Tom Anyman. Tom used to be a father too but he lost his kids after a messy divorce battle with his wife. For a year after the divorce Tom would call at our heroes home and complain about his wife's lies and the way the courts robbed him of his children. Our hero and his wife would listen at first and try to be sympathetic, but they quickly grew bored with Tom and his ravings. They knew Jack's Wife, Syvia Anywoman, well. They knew that if she really was making these accusations against Tom then he must have done something to deserve it. Now, as our hero looks down at Jacks prone body, he shudders and mutters, "Sorry Tom. I should have really listened to you shouldn't I." He feels ashamed that he did not support his friend when he needed help. He walks on. After a while he sees a young man walking hand in hand with a young girl. He shudders again and wonders if he should stop the young man and warn him what potential the sweet young thing beside him has to destroy his life and the lives of any children they may have in the future.

Our hero checks his watch and judges his mother must have woken up and got dressed by now, he calls to see her at her home. They sit together and cry. She for her grandchildren. He for his kids.

Outside in the cold frosty morning air. Tom Anyman breaths his last breath and dies alone. Above him an invisible cenotaph rises. It is inscribed with names. Long lists of names of other fallen "heroes" who have been slaughtered in the wars of the family courts. Men who have died, committed suicide, driven by dispair to kill their partners and/or children. Beneath those long lists is written one single word. A word uttered by countless thousands of good fathers denied access to their kids:-


Do not think that this article can be dismissed as merely a back lash against women. This is no mere back lash. It is a description of fact. If you are a man reading this and you have a partner and children, be afraid. One wrong move. Upset her just once too often and you can kiss your children goodbye for the last time. She will take your home, your money, your kids, your fatherhood and your self respect. She will do it to you with the help of our beloved government elected to bring justice to all the people without favour. After all, she is the one who is being oppressed.., isn't she? And lets face it guys, All men are bastards aren't they?




3.Quoted from




Copyright Apr 03.

George Rolph
South East Regional Organiser ManKind
Founder of man2man

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