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The hidden half of domestic violence

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Signs Of Abuse

The following signs often occur before actual abuse and may serve as clues to potential abuse:

Did HE/SHE grow up in a violent family? People who grow up in families where they have been abused as children, or where one parent beats the other, have grown up learning that violence is normal behavior.

Does HE/SHE tend to use force or violence to “solve” his problems? A young man who has a criminal record for violence, who gets into fights, or who likes to act tough is likely to act the same way with his wife and children.

Does HE/SHE have a quick temper? Does SHE over-react to little problems and frustration? Is SHE cruel to animals? Does SHE punch walls or throw things when HE'S/SHE’s upset?

Any of these behaviors may be a sign of a person who will work out bad feelings with violence.
Does HE/SHE abuse alcohol or other drugs? There is a strong link between violence and problems with drugs and alcohol. Be alert to HIM/HER possible drinking/drug problems, particularly if
HE/SHE refuses to admit that HE/SHE has a problem, or refuses to get help. Do not think that you can
change HIM/HER.

Does HE/SHE have strong traditional ideas about what a MAN/WOMAN should be and what a man/woman should be? Does HE/SHE think a man should come home, take care of his wife, and follow her wishes and orders?
Is HE/SHE jealous of your other relationships--not just with other MEN/WOMEN that you may know--but also with your men friends and your family?

Does HE/SHE keep tabs on you? Does  HE/SHE
want to know where you are at all times? Does HE/SHE want you with HIS/HER all of the time?

Does HE/SHE have access to guns, knives, or other lethal instruments? Does  HE/SHE talk of
using them against people, or threaten to use them to get even?

Does HE/SHE expect you to follow his orders or advice? Does HE/SHE become angry if you do not fulfill HIS/HER wishes or if you cannot anticipate what HE/SHE wants?

Does HE/SHE go through extreme highs and lows, almost as though HE/ SHE is two different people?

Is HE/SHE extremely kind one time, and extremely cruel at another time?

When HE/SHE gets angry, do you fear HIM/HER? Do you find that not making HIS/HER angry has become a major part of your life? Do you do what HE/SHE wants you to do, rather than what you want to do?

Does HE/SHE treat you roughly?

Does HE/SHE physically force you to do what you do not want to do?

PLEASE note. this list is found on almost all domestic violence sites but all “she” s “he”s
I posted this on one of their sites like this to empathize that she fits in here just as well.

The fact is that is should be HE/SHE It works BOTH WAYS.

Unless we approach this from BOTH SIDES we will NOT STOP THE PROBLEM

STOP VIOLENCE (PERIOD)

 

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