Shat terd

Men 

The hidden half of domestic violence

How to have eternal life


JOKES----OR ARE THEY?

Disclaimer:  Any joke that gets a laugh at the expense of another person is wrong...be they blonde, ethnic, or gender. In fact, it is SIN

(this is a work in progress...please submit any jokes you feel shows the real bias against men that society takes as fact.  Although I got many of these jokes from a site that has over 1200 male bashing jokes.  most are vulgar and not useable here.)

FROM ONE OF OUR LADY CLUB MEMBERS

" lets replace Man or male or he with woman, female, or she in each one of those "jokes" and see how many people think its funny.


Maybe on the site you could add that, or put the joke with man then change it to woman and see how many think its cute then!

I never realized how often its portrayed in the media that hitting a man is funny until I joined this club. I started really watching the subtle and not so subtle ways men are bashed and the laugh track sure gets a work out when it happens but show a woman being abused and its done in a serious manner and almost like watching a public service announcement.


I get male bashing jokes in my email all the time and am still amazed at how unfunny it would be considered if the same things were said about women. The very same people that send me the "stupid man jokes" would be called horrible insensitive chauvinist pigs if they sent the same about women.


Lets all have a good laugh at a man being punched in the face by his wife for whatever reason....hey he deserved it but remember there is NEVER a reason to hit a woman...


<<<<phatooey>>>>


Melanie

 

FALSE ALLEGATIONS  EASILY POSSIBLE

Subject: Fishing and reading 


A couple went on vacation to a fishing resort up north. The husband liked to fish at the crack of dawn. The wife liked to read. 

One morning the husband returned after several hours of fishing and decided to take a short nap. Although she wasn't familiar with the lake, the wife decided to take the boat. She rowed out a short distance, anchored, and returned to reading her book. 

Along came the sheriff in his boat. He pulled up alongside her and said, "Good morning, Ma'am. What are you doing?" "Reading my book," she replied...as she thought to herself, "isn't it obvious?" 

"You're in a restricted fishing area," he informed her. 

"Officer, I'm not fishing. Can't you see that?" 

"Yes, but you have all the equipment. I'll have to take you in and write you up." 

"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with rape," snapped the irate woman. 

"But, I haven't even touched you," groused the sheriff. 

"Yes, that's true," she replied, "but you do have all the equipment." 

MORAL: Never argue with a woman who knows how to read


IT IS IN OUR CHURCHES TOO!  

How often have you heard a pastor tell us that he or another man is the head of the home and if you do not believe it, just ask his wife...SHE said so!     One reason that so many laugh at this "joke" could well be that is is not a joke....even in our churches which should be teaching   1 Peter 3:1   and    Eph 5:22     It does indicate that  a wife is to be submissive to her husband as the Bible tells us is just lip service in most of our churches.  When we do things God's way....everyone is better off.   When we do not do things HIS way, it is one of the major CAUSES OF ABUSE!


In Our Christian Groups

1. If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it will
always be yours. If it doesn't come back, it was never yours to begin
with. But, if it just sits in your living room, messes up your stuff,
eats your food, uses your telephone, takes your money, and doesn't
appear to realize that you had set it free....... You either married
it or gave birth to it.

Yet we blame  men if they do not take the leadership of the home.  We do find a lot of truth in jokes.  This may have been intended at a joke, but there is so much truth in it.  Notice everything belongs to her.   We very often see this reflected in our society.  Many men have been charged with abuse for things very similar to the above.  Ladies,. reverse this...What if your husband said everything was his?  Would this be so funny then?

Sexist jokes has no place in our groups, or churches or our homes.


Ever notice that we often hear "IF MAMA IS NOT HAPPY, NO ONE IS HAPPY?

Have you ever heard someone say if DAD is not happy, NO ONE is happy?  Is  mama happiness so much more important than anyone else's so that if she is not happy she should make sure NO ONE else is either yet if dad is not happy he should just keep it inside and not let anyone know? 


Domestic violence is funny...when the victim is male.

Above left, a cartoon which suggests that female violence against men is acceptable, and even humorous. The man is portrayed as contemptible and foolish, a simpleton who is easily manipulated and controlled by his wife.

Above right, cartoons which depict a man (as opposed to a woman) as perpetrator ~ HE molested me - the rat and HIS accomplice.

2/3's of all child abuse is by a woman yet it shows the man as the perpetrator.

 

I am a marvelous housekeeper.  Every time I leave a man I keep his house    

How right she is... especially with the Violence Against Women Act, all she needs to do is "accuse him of domestic violence and she keeps everything.  

God created trees,
God created lakes,
God created men,
Oh, we all make mistakes

Now they are saying God made a mistake.  

What do you call a smart man?   A transsexual

and that  it takes  a man that wants to  and becomes a female to be smart

What do men and women have in common?    They both distrust men.

Is there any wonder with all the male bashing and MS information regarding men?

What is the difference between a single 40-year-old woman and a single 40-year-old man?
The 40-year-old woman thinks often of having children and the 40-year-old man thinks often about dating them.

Umm now they are saying all men are child molesters.  It is interesting that although there are many women that have sex with minor boys...they are not seen as child molesters and NONE have been given jail time for the FIRST offense of satutory rape 

Why do men want to vote for a female President?
Because we'd only have to pay her half as much.

Umm thought the pay gap was "suppose to be 76 cents per dollar...and even this is MS information

Wife: Do you love me just because my father left me a fortune?
Husband: Not at all honey, I would love you no matter who left you the money.

Ahhh finally some honesty!

 

First  there is no place in the Bible that limits the number of the "wise men" to three.  

2nd this shows the great lengths that  some go to bash ALL men and most of all, it is not surprising that the suicide rate for our boys has skyrocketed giving this type of constant propaganda

Finally  a Barbie I can relate to!     At long  last, here are some NEW Barbie dolls to  coincide with her and OUR aging gracefully.  These are a bit more realistic... 

Divorced Barbie.  Sells for $199.99. Comes with Ken's house, Ken's  car, and Ken's  boat.   

Umm even our "jokes" know that men often lose everything in a divorce.   Often they lose all contact with their children as the number one reason fathers do not have contact with their children after divorce is that mommy will not let them.  False accusations of domestic violence and child abuse are very common before a divorce and are encouraged by the VAWA as it assures the woman of full custody and keeping everything as the "joke" above indicates.  It is very likely this could be a cause of the epidemic if murder/suicides we see recently as more men are losing everything they worked for including their children and often freedom and feel hopeless.  Is it not time we VALUE ALL OUR PEOPLE?

 

Men are Like..

 

PLACEMATS

They only show up when there's food on the table. 

And when the plumbing needs fixing, the roof has a leak, or many other jobs men do around the house that often go unnoticed.  Also many men are busying WORKING to provide more toys for the women in their life which they say they do not need but if they did not have, the men would be be blasted for being "lazy"  

 

MASCARA

They usually run at the first sign of emotion. ...

Another catch 22,  men are blasted for not expression emotion but the moment they do they are criticized for doing so.

 

BIKE HELMETS

They're good in emergencies but usually just look silly. ...

UMMM some TRUTH?  Keep men around for emergencies only?  I thought feminist complained that men only want to "use" women but would not this be using men?

 

GOVERNMENT BONDS

They take so long to mature. ...

If it takes so long for boys to mature, Just why is it that not one woman was ever given jail time for the first offense having sex with one of these IMMATURE boys?

 

COPIERS

You need them in reproduction but that's about it. ...

And child support,  but NEVER let the dad see HIS kids. but then complain that he does not love and care for his children and is not involved with them.  (be sure you take out an order of protection to prevent dad from contacting his kids..)

 

LAVA LAMPS

Fun to look at it but not all that bright. ...

NOT if he is going out with the likes of the woman that wrote this garbage!

 

BANK ACCOUNTS

Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest. ...

Again,  he is only a wallet.

 

HIGH HEELS

They're easy to walk on once you get the hang of it. ...

I guess it is wrong for MEN to USE  women  but women are expected to USE men?

MINI SKIRTS

If your not careful they'll creep up your legs. ...

Another catch 22...expose yourself and then complain if men look!  Better yet, sue them for sexual harassment.    IF  they do not look, then complain that they do not appreciate you

 

HANDGUNS

Keep one around long enough and your gonna want to shoot it.

Many women are encouraged to take out orders of protecting because the "think" a man may be angry.  Now they advocate actual violence and that is alright.. as long as  a woman is doing the violence.  Notice the dehumanizing of the man by calling him an IT also.

BRAIN TRANSPLANT

In the hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where their

family member lay gravely ill.

Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber. I'm afraid I'm the bearer of bad news," he said as he surveyed the worried faces. "The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant. It's an experimental procedure, semi-risky and you will have to pay for the brain yourselves."

The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news. After a great  length of time, someone asked, "Well, how much does a brain cost?" The doctor quickly responded, "$5,000 for a male brain, and $200 for a female brain."

The moment turned awkward. Men in the room tried not to smile, avoiding eye contact with the women, but some actually smirked. A man, unable to control his curiosity, blurted out the question everyone wanted to ask, "Why is the male brain so much more?"

The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and so to the entire group said, "It's just standard pricing procedure. We have to mark down the price of the female brains, because they've been used."

 

Umm is it not strange that MEN can  STILL  OUTTHINK  the FEMINIST  that come up with these jokes.....WITHOUT using their BRAIN?

 

1. Don't imagine you can change a man unless he's in diapers.

Ummm one of the indicators of domestic violence is when a man tries to control and change a woman...now they are telling women they should change men.   CONTROL...CLICK HERE

2. What do you do if your boyfriend walks-out? You shut the door.

But complain like crazy that he will not "commit" himself to a relationship.

3. If they put a man on the moon -- they should be able to put them all up there.

Then complain that women do not have equal representation in space exploration.  When men make the moon a paradise...then insist that women are responsible and should have an equal share in the benefits.

4. Never let your man's mind wander -- it's too little to be out alone.

But file for protection if a man never lets a woman go out.  After all that is control and control is domestic violence.  IF a man does it to a woman!

5. Go for younger men. You might as well, they never mature anyway.

Umm if that is the case, perhaps women should be charged with rape anytime they have sex with an immature man

6. Men are all the same -- they just have different faces, so that you can tell them apart.

7. Definition of a bachelor; a man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable.

IS that the reason we always here IF MAMA IS NOT HAPPY  NO ONE IS HAPPY?

8. Women don't make fools of men -- most of them are the do-it-yourself types.

9. Best way to get a man to do something, is to suggest they are too old for it.

If a man did this to a woman,  it would be called abuse as he would be insulting her.

10. Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.

Ask any man who has been giving an order of protection because some woman THINKS he is dangerous.

11. If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital.

Wonder WHO drove him there?

12. The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even in biblical times, men wouldn't ask for directions.

Ummm More likely  it was because the men tried to appease the women when they complained about leaving  Egypt 

13. If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him checkbooks.

Ahh another truthful statement.  Most of the divorces are by women who have often found a new honey that makes more MONEY!

14. Sadly, all men are created equal

What and women are created superior?  Guess the real feminist agenda is starting to come out.

 

PEOPLE...LOOK AT THESE THINGS... IS THERE ANY WONDER WHY THE MALE SUICIDE RATE IS SKY ROCKETING AS OUR YOUNG BOYS ARE BEING TAUGHT THIS STUFF?

IS IT NOT TIME TO VALUE  ALL OUR PEOPLE?

Some Cartoons do get it right!

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JUNE is Domestic Violence Against Men Awareness Month

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