The hidden half of domestic violence
How to have eternal life
Agony of Christmas
the Season to be jolly…or is it?
it is for most people even in this....no scratch that. I am starting to
wonder if most people will be jolly this year. There are so many things to
be concerned that will prevent that jolly feeling.
month a half million people became unemployed. I wonder how many of these
people have any "ho ho ho" left as they wonder how their essential
bills will be paid, bills such as those for heat and lights and basic food?
These men and women are not worried about keeping a corporate jet in the air;
they are worried about keeping their homes above freezing. Many will not
have a means to give their loved ones gifts this year. Although they know
the adults will understand their children may not. You see, as we have
commercialized Christmas more and more over the last few decades, we have grown
accustomed to allowing things to take the place of time. Although our
children may think having the latest X Box or Game Boy shows how much you love
them, in the long run, they will realize that love is shown by the time they are
are many ways we can give things that are far more valuable then those things we
can buy. This can be shown by some recent requests children have had for
Santa this year. More and more children are not asking for gifts…they
are asking Santa to help their dad or mom to get a job. Others are asking
that their dad or mom will be safe while they are deployed. Still others
just want to be able to see a parent they have not been able to see for years.
My friend, this is what I want to discuss for a few moments with you right now.
It is why this message is titled the "Agony of Christmas."
ago, we posted an article by Arizona Fathers called "The Road from
Home" which you can read here: http://www.shatterdmen.com/road_from_home__by__arizona_fath.htm
is a story of a boy that did not see his father for 3 years and finally he was
going to see him but he wondered why he had to get dressed up for church on a
Monday. Mommy explained that everyone was going to church to visit daddy. When
the family arrived at the church, and the little boy saw his daddy for the first
time in 3 years, he remembered the day that his daddy had to go away.
The agony of Christmas I want to tell you about is that there are literally hundreds of thousands of men and some women who will not be able to see their children this Christmas. This is not by choice; it is because they will not be allowed. I have personally talked to many who have sent gifts to their children only to have them returned unopened as they knew their children were being told that they did not love them any more. I am sure other gifts may well have been repackaged and given "from Santa"
Agony of Christmas will be further played out with an increase in suicides at
this time of year. We have already seen this when a father in Georgian
took his own life the day before Thanksgiving
when family court took away his right to be a
father to his children after listening only to one side while ignoring the
other. I have seen this so very often throughout the year but
more so at this time.
have written to many Christian ministries only to be ignore as I am sure this may
be too because not only are business focused on getting as much money as
possible, I think these ministries are afraid of revealing the truth for fear
donations will decrease but is not the truth more important? Oh,
they are quick to point out the feminist lies about domestic violence but when
given the opportunity to discover the truth, they too will bury their heads in
the sand. Many of the Christian "ministries" that focus on
domestic abuse will present only the statistics that we will find on gender
feminist sites but they will not explore unbiased sources. They too
demonize men in general just as many churches do on Father's day when men are
blamed for all the evils of society.
a message titled Bitter/Sweet….The Hidden
from fatherless homes account for:
of youth suicides. (Source: US Dept. of Health
& Human Services, Bureau of the Census).
of pregnant teenagers. (Source: US Dept. of Health & Human Services)
of all homeless and runaway children.
of juveniles in state-operated institutions come from fatherless homes (DOJ,
of all children that exhibit behavioral disorders. (Source:Center for Disease
of rapists motivated with displaced anger. (Source: Criminal Justice &
Behavior, Vol. 14, p. 403-26).
of all high school dropouts. (Source: National Principals Association Report on
the State of High Schools ).
of all adolescent patients in chemical abuse centers. (Source: Rainbows
for all God`s Children).
Fulton Co. Georgia jail populations, Texas Dept. of Corrections
of all youths sitting in prisons.
spite of this our family courts, often upon the
insistence of CPS will remove the father and make him a visitor The irony is
this is suppose to be for the "good of the children yet 65% of all
child abuse is by the mother but the father gets custody in about 10% of
all contested cases. Does this not sound like it fits this profile...sweet in
the mouth but bitter in the belly?
this bitter/sweet agenda, we find the removal of all weapons from fathers
without any due process of law by demanding they
be turned in when a restraining order is filed against him and folks...it
don't take much to get one of those pieces of paper. All women need do is
say...I am afraid and she's got one.
the picture? Let me clarify it a bit more. Fathers have throughout time fought
to protect their families...their wife and kids. Think of Brave Heart and the
Patriot to get a good picture of this. Now think of the founding fathers of the
United States when in their wisdom they included the right to bear arms, not for
each man to protect himself from foreign invaders, but to protect his family
from our own government, the same government we have today that has tried to
pass strict gun controls but have been "shot down" by the National
Rifle Association or the NRA. Now comes
along these domestic violence laws which
although it has always been a crime to assault someone is now classified a
"civil" matter and thus much less due process of law is needed to take
away Constitutional rights such as we see in the right to bear arms and that we
should not lose any liberties without due process of law
hundreds of thousands of men have lost these rights without any due process. I
can only think of one reason for this. The Bible tells of one world dictator
that will soon be coming. To set the stage for this, this person will need to
assure full compliance with little or no resistance as possible. Remove a loving
father and husband from their home, and most will have lost their will to fight.
Coupled with the fact that most of the guns have now been removed, he has little
to fight with if he does chose to fight. Result, our liberties...our freedom
will have been removed by the very laws that seemed so sweet in our mouth...but
now that it is in our belly.....it will have destroyed the same society that we
were told it was protecting!
agony of Christmas is not so much the economy although that is adding to it this
year. Once again the agony of Christmas is that so many men and some women
will be kept from their children as they know these precious children are being
told they do not love them any more. How many suicides will it take before
anyone will listen? Will anyone care if another 7 year old finally gets to
see dad or mom as they are lying in a casket?
the Christian ministries this may be sent to, Shattered Men is not asking for a
dime…but we are asking for PRAYER. Over the last several
years, we have seen many men and women kept from suicide because we are willing
to listen. How many could be saved if they only knew about this ministry?
Oh I do not want anyone to know who I am, but I do want everyone to know the
REAL solution to the problems of abuse. Everything I have written
includes this solution and it will be a part of every workshop we present.
We know it is the solution because it works.
real solution….is a right relationship with Jesus Christ as you can find here:
Men is aimed for those who do not know the LORD as well as for the Christian men
and women who have or are suffering from abuse. Many of those who have
come to Shattered Men were not Christians when they came but they are now. About
a half dozen have been pastors who have told us that they are in an
abusive relationship and do not know where to turn. Many of the Christian
men who have come to us have told us that when they tried to talk to their
pastors, they felt abused even more. Many were ready to give up on
Christianity until they found....Shattered Men.
are many Christians who would love to find a place to get help for an abusive
relationship that would love to find a place to go that addresses this from
a Biblical point of view. Some of those receiving this may not like this
approach but could you let those on your list know about Shattered Men for those
that would like to find a Biblically based source of support?
want people to know how it feels to have your children stolen from you.
Please read this:
do not want to destroy marriage, we want to save them
have over 200 messages written for shattered men and women
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JUNE is Domestic Violence Against Men Awareness Month